The breakups.

Before you get married - before you settle down and commit yourself to one person for the rest of your life - you should have at least 3 relationships. And you should break up from these 3 relationships in 3 different ways. These experiences will teach you valuable lessons that you need to learn before you can truly find happiness. Think of it as your Foundation, Intermediate and Advanced-level courses.

1. The breakup in which your heart gets broken. 

Most people will experience this. This is the breakup that hurts really, really bad. Maybe you were cheated on. Maybe you were just cruelly and coldly dumped. Or maybe (and I know people who've experienced this before) your partner just up and disappeared and never even bothered to let you know it's over. In any case, it's the kind of breakup where you feel like your world has just ended.

The lesson: You can survive. Your world has not ended. Your life goes on. And eventually, you will learn to open up again and love another person. The first time hurts the worst; if it happens again, just tell yourself "been there, done that." Having your heart broken doesn't kill you. It only makes your heart stronger.

2. The breakup in which you break someone else's heart. 

Most people may not even be aware that they experienced this. This is where you dump someone. It might be for any number of reasons. You found someone better. You got tired of the relationship. You never really loved that person, it was only lust or pity or puppy love. But that person whom you dumped will suffer the deepest of pain, and it is because of you.

The lesson: You realize the power you have over the people close to you. You realize how badly you can hurt someone, especially those who love you. You realize your responsibility to be kind, sensitive and respectful - to not be the kind of people who hurt you.

3. The breakup that is perfectly amicable and has no hard feelings whatsoever. 

Most people may never experience this, but it is important. Maybe the relationship was troubled and stormy - but the both of you can agree that breaking up is for the best. Or maybe the relationship was perfectly pleasant, but it has to end for whatever reason, and both of you can accept that. Maybe you can both remain friends - and only friends.

The lesson: That love and romance doesn't have to be painful. You don't have to have drama in your life. Your relationship can be steady and peaceful without being boring; it can be wild and passionate without being heart-breaking. If you're smart, if you're mature, if you know how to choose people who are equally smart and mature, you can be happy. Even through breakups.

Taken from a forum I frequent. And this is just a note for myself.

I am a strong believer that everything happens for a reason. And I believe that there's no turning back once something had happened. Still, this does not mean I am encouraging relationships or being a couple, before getting married. I know that's what most people do, and I used to be one from the likes but as the time goes by, I no longer favor such thing. 

Lame, but...yeah.

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